Nightmares

A few months ago I was in Chicago staying at this ratty hostel, and a big old horse fly got caught in the room (which had no fan, no a/c or anything).  The sound of the fly whapping the window over and over again was like NAILS ON THE FRIGGIN CHALKBOARD, and now spurs the perfect time to bring up the nightmares the movie THE FLY used to give me.  When Jeff Goldblum vomits on that guys hand?  Jesus.

Completely Forgetting Sarah Marshall

Diatonic Ratios and Musical Scales or Just Some Douchebags with a Board and Rope

Hey, remember crop circles?
Well, some people seem to think that their are musical ratios in the “perfection” of how they are created. Nice work dude. Nice. Except, most crop circles were proven to be huge mother FAKERIES.  http://www.cropcircleresearch.com/articles/diatonics.html

Pedal Copter

Da Vinci wrote a pretty cool quote once about dreams: “The eye sees a thing more clearly in dreams than the imagination awake.”

Well my eyes see insane stuff.

First of all, I’m worried about getting sick. I remembered this morning that I used Lysol on my kitchen counter, getting the copper grime behind the sink handles, and then I forgot to wash my hands after. Which is just great because I ate a subway sandwich (which by the way, of course, tasted funny.) I should be fine, but I’ll let you know.

My dreams are always about working. Isn’t that a form of anxiety? Working in San Fran is cool, I’m right next to a Barnes and Noble, a Starbucks, and a pretty cool mall, but the best part is the art. The undiscovered stuff: the graffitti on the walls and the billboards. Sometimes I make my own stuff (I’ll be posting that stuff soon). That’s my favorite. That’s what keeps me going.

My boss is a really an asshole. He’s bowling ball fat and is always scratching at the meat of his crotch. Yesterday we had this interaction:

Boss: “It stinks in here. You clear the floor drain?”

Me: “Yes.” (scratching my head)

Boss: “Don’t do that. You’ll get your filthy hair everywhere. That shit gets everywhere.”

Me: “I’m wearing a hair net.”

Boss: “I don’t care don’t ever touch your hair next to my fish. Capeshe? (Italian for “understand?”)

Then you know what he did?

He picked his nose.

Remember When This Happened to You?

What it Actually Says

When you put on the Rowdy Roddy Piper glasses…

1-800-We Take Your Smile From You

Advertisements in cities are overbearing and nightmarish.  This is what it actually looks like…